speaker-0: The music we grew up on, didn't just entertain us. It raised us and shaped us. It shaped how we saw love, how we saw struggle, how we saw ourselves. Because it wasn't just music. It was all in our house, it was in our cars. I remember my mother and father singing to it. And in a lot of ways, we still carry that music with us today. Those songs that pick you up, set the mood, or take you right back to the moments that matter. Four titles, one truth. I'm Tommy.

speaker-1: And I'm Lance. Today, we're talking about the music we grew up on. Songs that defined our childhood.

speaker-0: This is a conversation rooted in lived experience, not advice, not instruction, just honest reflection. All right, let's get into it. When you think of old school or throwback music, what era comes to mind for you?

speaker-1: Let's go. That's that Motown. Smokey Robinson and The Temptations and Stevie Wonder. That's old school for us. I'd say for me, for us, for our age group. That's what our parents would listen to. teenagers and in their 20s them young guns rolling, that's what they were listening to and rolling in.

speaker-0: So who controlled the music in your house, your mom or your pops?

speaker-1: Both, yeah. mean, in the car, know, it my father. Dealing with A-Track at a radio station.

speaker-0: So do you remember music from the radio, from the 8-track, from the records, or from tapes more?

speaker-1: Probably little bit of both, but probably the radio more. Just being in the car, either going to school, going where? to grandma's house. off somewhere. Yeah, but, but then in the car it was either the radio or the A-track. So, just depending on what the feeling was at a drive. ⁓

speaker-0: Yeah. So when I think of old school, I'm in that same era because it's what, you know, it's what mom and pops had playing. Mom played music in the house more. ⁓ and. when I was growing up, it was mainly Christian. Yeah, so we talking old happy day with the Hawkins family. And then, you know, we had some white man, Sandy Patty, we had Lauren L. Harris, you know, so those are the, that's the music that I remember hearing them, when people sing, Jesus. that's what I remember. But when, you know, it was just the music, it was dad. And was always either the Four Tops, The Temptations, Smokey, ⁓ Marvin Gaye, you know, and then the old school from Alabama he used to bring. What's his name? can't remember. Deep South. Yeah, Deep South. ⁓

speaker-1: Coming up from the

speaker-0: clubs, hole in the walls. But I think so the reason eight tracks stand out to me is because my uncle used to have a cutlass. Oh, and he used to have the eight track adapter in there. Yeah. So it was about the same size as the eight track, but a little longer. Okay. So that you could put the tape in there. Yeah. They put it was as wide and as

speaker-1: How big was that adapter?

speaker-0: Deep but it was a little longer because the tape never actually went in it's just the eight track went in and then records because my mom and dad has so many records over years. Oh really?

speaker-1: Yeah, my brother had more records than anything.

speaker-0: My parents never had eight tracks. All their cars, when I was around, it was all just radio. Yeah, in the car. And my dad used to listen to 700 WLWs. If he wasn't listening to music, he was listening to sports talk.

speaker-1: Who influenced your taste in music the most? Parents, siblings, or friends?

speaker-0: I will say started off with my sibling, my sister specifically, ⁓ and my and my friends. Okay, would say that's how it started off. But as I got older, I got back into the old school, our old school era. And, and then the Temptations movie came out, the five heartbeats, you know, came out. So there was it was that that do off, you know, that that caught my attention back there. Yeah.

speaker-1: It's that appreciation. I think you appreciate the music more when you get It's like, oh shoot, that's a cut.

speaker-0: And then my sister, she was a prince in Michael Jackson. Prince was number one, Michael Jackson was close number two. so she's got me to listen to Prince because for a while I was like, heels in his butt out. Yeah. But once you listen to like Purple Rain, you hear the talent in there. And it's just a little Red Corvette and all them.

speaker-1: In the perm curl Joker. learning stories like he played all the instruments. Just all of that. Probably my brother. Brother then as I got a little older, know, getting out the house and it'd be friends because then it's like, oh, did you hear such and such? You got to, know, and that's when we, because you know, our folks had the boom boxes and stuff and then the tapes started coming out.

speaker-0: What about you? What's the most? You had friends that carried a boombox? I never had no friends that carried a boombox. When I turned 16, my mom gave me a Plymouth Horizon. So, if we were either in the house, walking around playing sports or something, or driving somewhere. And the main music I remember driving is the new edition. It was always new edition.

speaker-1: New addition.

speaker-0: And that's the thing, so one of the rules, the unwritten rules of young black men at that time is fast music only. Don't let me catch you in the car. Don't be having no candy. Oh, oh, oh, A car full of ass in your elbow.

speaker-1: You in rain. ⁓ Catch that.

speaker-0: So did y'all, did you, you took the bus to school?

speaker-1: No, with my father. So I was going say it would be a variety. So I ride with my father, shoot, back and forth until I started driving myself. So it would be different. Yeah, whatever he was. Yeah, and he would listen to a variety, which was good because it gave me little appreciation. But the Eagles and all of those.

speaker-0: I'm going this to. That's where MTV came in for me because before before MTV all I knew was black music When it came to R &B, okay rap and stuff like that But of course pop music because it was on the radio, but when MTV came out That's when you started to see them videos and that's when MTV was like something you had to

speaker-1: had to see the latest and the greatest. But my mom and dad listened to different things because she was the Lou Raw, Julio Iglesias and some of them fellas.

speaker-0: Luraw. Tom Jones. All them jokers. So where did you really discover music once you started getting out on your own? You sort of mentioned it with your friends.

speaker-1: I mean just well, you you start a either you sit in well, you know locker room when you had practice or something and you get Yeah, just talking about it cuz they they going Going to this concert. Did you see this video? You know, there's two videos Did you see that video or such as such? right. Yes that that way friends start talking about and it's like, okay. Yeah, no I joke a wack

speaker-0: riding with people. What's a video that you remember that stands out to you?

speaker-1: ⁓ you know Michael Jackson, that damn, Billie Jean first. I think, yeah, I think Billie Jean came up. Yeah, Billie Jean first, but Thriller, cause it was just, it was prime time. It was prime time. So I was like,

speaker-0: The main video that stands out to me after all these years I would probably have to say MC Hammer.

speaker-1: Yes, I mean it was yeah to see that see that's hard because it was a bunch of videos Damn! Yeah, mean that between him and then ⁓ shit when ⁓ LL Cool J I'm bad

speaker-0: Boxing ring. ⁓ Yeah. Did you ever have a walk, man? Yeah.

speaker-1: I the tape then, well I got the hand-me-down. I think my brother had a CD and then it was like a hand-me-down that he left whenever he went to... ⁓

speaker-0: the CD. I had a tape thing. So here's what I had growing up. First I had the simple tape recorder to where you put the tape in, push the button, you could record on it. The reason that's significant, I'm gonna tell y'all some truth is that now. So when Bobby Brown left New Edition, I felt I could step here, man. I'm not joking. So what I did was I would have their tapes and I'd be singing it all the time. And I used to be able to sing okay. I can't do that anymore.

speaker-1: use k- kiiiitttt

speaker-0: No, but you know what, what I was really, ⁓ really caught up in is they had an album where they did old school music like Earth Angel. ⁓ And they did those type of songs. And I always used to be singing my butt off. couldn't tell me, no, I knew I was going to replaced by me, bro. I knew the moves. You know what saying? And then I felt I could at least sing as good as her. I didn't make it. Yeah.

speaker-1: Bye!

speaker-0: They ain't got no buster Johnny Gill like he can sing-sing. Way better than me, so.

speaker-1: Yeah. I'm just trying to think, yeah, because in the car, my first car had a tape player in it. Yeah, the Chevette. Little light blue Chevette with the speaker in the back. So mine was in the room.

speaker-0: God, they used to call me Disco Man, because I used to have house speaker. So my sister had a record player with the detachable speakers. And so when I got my car, just wasn't doing it with the door speakers. So I went without an amp. I just went in there and I connected to my speaker wire and connected. Simple. It was simple then. it was just loud. We two speakers.

speaker-1: See, just had one speaker in the back rattling.

speaker-0: I was that guy that dried down, you hear all the word. So, I ain't saying, we just jammin' to it this year.

speaker-1: So what song instantly takes you back to being a kid at home with your family?

speaker-0: So you hit on it before man. Billie Jean, but it's not Billie Jean the video. It's when he was on Motown's 25th. ⁓ I remember. Yeah, was every bite. My dad, my sister, my mom, we were all there watching it. So when I hear Billie Jean, I think of that. But the most fun memory of music is Thriller because We was waiting for the MTV premiere and I told you I had a cousin named Mark Howard and he lived diagonally from me. Okay. So he was on the other block. If we were all waiting for the MTV premiere and that joker showed up, right. And so we go through the video and you remember when they start to dance that joker, Mark, he was like, is that Natty? Look at Natty. My mom's saying Natty. Look at Natty out there. And I just remember that so much. And I recently got back in touch with my cousin. Mark and I just said I said do you remember this man and he was like I think so man and the more I talked about the more I remember but I think that that thriller video my dad wasn't there he was at work but it was me my sister Mark somebody else was there but I don't remember who But it was just a blast, even mom just sitting there laughing. Yeah, so that was good time. What about you?

speaker-1: For me, it's a shoot on a trip going on road trips and my father would be playing Hotel California and I'd be on the floor of the van, listening, rolling, listening, doing whatever. But yeah, mean, every time when I hear that, it takes me back. Yeah, it takes me back to we rolling. We rolling someplace where we rolled all the time. I out to Colorado.

speaker-0: He's asleep. So I got so many more, like dad used to sing, ⁓ Merry Christmas baby coming down the steps.

speaker-1: Is it on Christmas Day or just all during Christmastime?

speaker-0: Christmas it played all during the day but on Christmas morning that Joker you turn that on that once you know he's up and just guaranteed you putting on a show man coming down the stairs singing and doing the dances and then going up tomorrow yeah that that one is a hundred percent locked in I remember what's the boys name you you got what I need

speaker-1: It's cute. ⁓

speaker-0: But he, I remember that music video coming out. I remember Hello, Lionel Richie. with the blind sculptress. It's just so much, man.

speaker-1: That's Run DMC and that's one of the first first concert that I went to was a Run DMC concert.

speaker-0: So when did you, when did rap take over for you?

speaker-1: probably around that high school time frame.

speaker-0: High school. We had buses where when we when we would go to school, ⁓ go to Vale at the time and then Middletown High School. ⁓ If we had ⁓ if we brought a tape and it didn't have cursing on it, then the bus driver would let us play. Yeah. So that's when I really got introduced to different music that was more than on the radio. know what I'm And then so like my... Yeah, it was well it was the whole tape so you'd hear the other songs too and I know and there was a lot of mixtapes too but ⁓ I just know that like my first...

speaker-1: I went just popular music.

speaker-0: real rap introduction was Eric B and Raquel. That was my first real rap introduction. That's when I was like, and then it was him, then it was Kumo D, because I love Kumo D. And then I was the guy that was like, Kumo D is killing LL. I was that guy, because I know all of these songs. And then it ended up going to ⁓ I love Fresh Prince, ⁓ Will Smith, Jazzy Jeff.

speaker-1: That's all that East Coast.

speaker-0: Just. But my first introduction to West Coast became a too short fair, Too short was raw, boy. ⁓ My first introduction to down south was when I would visit my cousins in Alabama. ⁓ And you'd hear like MC Shadi and stuff like Shan. ⁓ But the most outrageous introduction was to live crew.

speaker-1: That was the taboo. You got to hear that. was like, did you hear that too, love? See them videos.

speaker-0: 7 business But you know what? I didn't see enough of them. Because I was not aware of that and I didn't have VCRs at the time. But yeah, I was very much aware of what they was about. ⁓ I was still a little young on that one. Then when I got of age, know, the military is just you hear a little bit of everything. And then that's when I think the military is when I really started to shape. what I like. What you like. Yeah, because it, you know, I don't know if a lot of people remember, but music was regional. Yeah. Yeah. So there would be song like there's so I played a song the other day 112s a letter. Okay. Yeah. Nikki never heard this song before in her life. Really? Yeah. And I'm just like, it's amazing how regional you music used to be. But that's when I started to ⁓ high school. is when I started to get into R &B. know, Keith Sweats, know, the new additions and all that. And then after I was in the Army, Genuine came out, you know, and tank.

speaker-1: Please don't

speaker-0: So that's when I started to shape myself. Did you ever have recordings on your horse, man?

speaker-1: Oh, on the tapes? the radio? Because you know, you either do the, was it the quiet jam? You to the quiet jam, you taping the quiet jam and you'll tape the countdown. you're trying to get it right, you know, you'd be like, stop talking, stop talking. Trying to get it, trying to cut it right.

speaker-0: I used to try to talk, talk, then as soon as I finished, you know, like catching on

speaker-1: K. Answer machine, oh yeah. On the answer machine, oh yeah. Remember on the answer machine too.

speaker-0: Did you know how to edit tape? No. Man, I used to... used to... It is. Used to pull the tape apart. Well, unscrew the edges, pull the tape apart, and then you have to listen to what you want and then clip it. And then you put a piece of clear scotch tape, a small piece of clear scotch tape.

speaker-1: That's a lot of work.

speaker-0: to connect it back together and then you go. That's a lot of work. voice is on fire. You can have a piece of my jammer. Let me ask you this. Looking back now, did music, how did the music you grew up to shape who you became? Can you draw a link to how music has

speaker-1: ⁓ my god.

speaker-0: developed in you as an adult.

speaker-1: I mean, it's always open. I guess it made me open to hearing new things. ⁓ except here, fine, yeah. Everybody likes to, like, like a little country sometimes. I like a little rock and roll. I like a little rock. I mean, it just, it helped me to go, I would say, I wanna try to correlate, be a little more flexible with things. Everybody gonna be a little different. It's just like some music and shit. You can always find something in whatever genre it is.

speaker-0: There's there's a to me there's a baseline of good music and it can touch from anywhere because I look at it this way so the 60s the mid 60s and before right the old-school music I believe that there was pop strong pop and then R &B influence right there was straight R &B or R &B pop is right right but there was a separation between the two Then in the 70s, can't lie, man, them white musicians, their jokers started, they started to hear R &B, and so they started to ⁓ take that sound, and a lot of them didn't do so great, but some of them were just like,

speaker-1: like the Michael McDonalds the ⁓ I'm trying to, what was the other? That I didn't even know that it was a white dude singing the song.

speaker-0: You talking about Mrs. Nair.

speaker-1: So, ⁓

speaker-0: ⁓ I can't. But do you see a line to how music has affected you and helped develop you as a man or as a person?

speaker-1: I say, I mean, like I said before, I mean, it's made me, I guess, more open to accepting new things, learning new things, giving things time, trying to see the best out of. everything and everyone's, you know, different situations and stuff. I mean, I would say that just because it's just, it was one of those things, it's dependent, and it's one of those things where it's like depending on the situation, like that's what you, that's what you're listening to. Okay, that's what we gonna do, this is gonna give me hype. That's why I need to try to set the mood, you So, mean, so different, I guess different things like that, and I,

speaker-0: Yeah.

speaker-1: Because I'm not a huge, I wasn't a musical, musical person. I didn't play an instrument or anything like that. Like my kids both can play instruments and shit. I'm like, man, I wish I could, would have learned to play the piano or play the saxophone or whatever.

speaker-0: was in band when I went to Milletown Christian. And the first thing I wanted to play was the trombone, man. Because it was just smooth, man. I liked the... Honestly, that's the only thing I could do. So, check this out. My drum teacher came to me one day. He's like, uh... He's like, uh... So, what do you think about the trombone? I was like, I like it. You know, it's fun. He was like, uh... Have you ever considered droves?

speaker-1: People want to start off on the drugs He's like he tried to move you like you had to get off ⁓

speaker-0: Yeah, he told me to go. And then I got me a snare drum and my dad never forgive me for that. I used to be... I could play the drums, the snare pretty good, but I never really learned how to play a set of drums. And that's a different beast. But then my music talent ran out. I don't really think that I can say music shaped me as a man because there were so many other... relevant like my dad, uncles and so forth. So I don't think music shaped me, but I do know that I evolved with the music. know, like I said, in the beginning it was old school. We're talking Temptations, Fortas, like you said. And then I remember I started to... learn and hear what the younger people were listening to in that era when you would finally get out the house and you'd hear the Al Green's, Teddy Pina grass, you know, you'd hear like saying and saying, and then, ⁓ and so like,

speaker-1: Yeah, people can really see.

speaker-0: And that was cool. And but then when I got to an age where I controlled the radio, that's when we're talking rap was finding itself. Public Enemy, X Clan. Those are ⁓ Big Mike. ⁓ Those are the type of ⁓ the music I was playing, but I'm still playing R &B.

speaker-1: This thing is like you can never get away from it because they especially if you listen to rap they sampling it. so you'd like

speaker-0: Yeah, yeah, yeah, a lot of people don't even know that where that's all came from. and then I rap sort of got away from me for a while because it was the life that I was living Didn't fit no more and some of that stuff, you know saying cuz they told me there was a time when there's talking about real life in the streets and all that stuff But I wouldn't any street. ⁓ So I sort of disconnected from that and then got strong in the R &B and R &B is where I I would say Living if I'd say if you look at my Apple music I'd probably say

speaker-1: So you.

speaker-0: 85 % it's R &B. I'm talking over the decades and then that 15 % is probably... hip-hop and this also over the decades but i i do know that there used to be a time when i would use the music to try to find out what i'm feeling you know saying i'd not find out but try to relate you know i'm saying because there was a time in uh... in uh... eighties and nineties where There was music that would talk about feelings and talk about that stuff. And so I would like, when I had a crush on a girl and stuff like that, yeah, ⁓ this one. ⁓ God, ⁓ Groove me. You know, so, but now it's music first. If the music's hitting, then it has a chance.

speaker-1: It's a good beat. I it's got a good beat. like I give it a chance.

speaker-0: But I used to go over like rap in the beginning. I used to all about words. I used to learn every rap song, you know.

speaker-1: Well, you can understand. Yeah, follow him better than a lot of guys. And it's like what?

speaker-0: like you know ⁓ BDP you know ⁓ like I said Eric B and Rakim I said X Clan came alive NWA even for a second but Too Short Too Short is not something I should have ⁓ ended up hearing because my mom would not be acceptable Too Short back then but Too Short used to be raw So, yeah, but, ⁓ so like now Afrobeats is my main music that I listen to. ⁓ when we work out, when I work out, it's usually, ⁓ hip hop. and when I'm chilling, just trying to relax or getting a groove, it's R and B. ⁓ there are pop artists that I like out there. but it's nowhere near as many. I don't know them like I used to know them. Like Luther, you know, like even Michael Jackson, like ⁓ Billy Ocean, you know.

speaker-1: That's I mean, I understand how our parents said, know, you know, like, like some of the stuff that my like, Miles would be listening to or McKinsey, I'd be in the car with him. It's like, it's like, don't get it. I don't get it. What is this? Okay.

speaker-0: And that's the. This? This is devil music! This is music.

speaker-1: So it's always trending back to like, well, the Afrobeats, Afrobeats. ⁓

speaker-0: Man one of the best surprise Never really gotten a reggae man, but I'd liked it on the radio, but I never really bought it or down but I When we went to Ghana This was in 24 The our guide he put on some music he's like yeah, I got some music for y'all and I'm sitting there like

speaker-1: Rege, let's do a little rege.

speaker-0: Come on, man, you ain't saying nothing. I knew this. don't know all the words, but I was jamming man and he was like blowing away the fact that I knew artists that were from Ghana in the United States and that it's on my playlist. Afrobeats would probably be the first thing I'd turn on and then R &B over the decades because the new R &B. Yeah, it's every once in a while I find something that grooves, but it's not.

speaker-1: I mean, because I'd listen to the Yacht Brat. Yacht Brat.

speaker-0: ⁓ Nicki love. See the butt at the same time, The Bee Gees. Hey man. And hey, Siren Night Fever. If you ain't watch Siren Night Fever, there's something wrong with you. That joker, but the Bee Gees, I love.

speaker-1: I it's just like all that I like I can appreciate all those like those were all on when we were growing up Yeah, but it didn't really pay attention to

speaker-0: Yeah, well like you said, unless your parents play it and then when you got out the house and you were in charge it was what's now. Yeah, listen to none of that. yeah, that was it man, was, loved it.

speaker-1: is what I'm listening. Music just doesn't stay in the past. It shows up in how we think, how we feel, and how we remember. Think about that one song for you and here's what we want you to do. Share this episode with someone who grew up with you or someone who knows your story because they might hear something in this that reminds them of you. Alright, so join us next time so we can do what we We gone.

speaker-0: We're gonna do it.

speaker-1: keep the conversation going. Come on back. All right.

speaker-0: There it is.